- He who has a thousand friends has not a friend to spare,
And he who has one enemy will meet him everywhere.
c.602–661 Arab ruler, fourth Islamic caliph: A Hundred Sayings
- Almost all of our relationships begin and most of them continue as forms of mutual exploitation, a mental or physical barter, to be terminated when one or both parties run out of goods.
The Dyer's Hand (1963) ‘Hic et Ille’ 1907–73 English poet:
- In necessary things, unity; in doubtful things, liberty; in all things, charity. 1615–91 English divine: motto
- Am I my brother's keeper?
: Genesis ch. 4, v. 9
- Love is like the wild rose-briar;
Friendship like the holly-tree:
The holly is dark when the rose-briar blooms,
But which will bloom most constantly?
1818–48 English novelist and poet: ‘Love and Friendship’ (1846)
- Love, friendship, respect do not unite people as much as common hatred for something.
Notebooks (1921) 1860–1904 Russian dramatist and short-story writer:
- It is a curious thought, but it is only when you see people looking ridiculous, that you realize just how much you love them.
An Autobiography (1977) 1890–1976 English writer of detective fiction:
- Men love women
Women love children
Children love hamsters
And hamsters don't love anyone.
Times 14 February 1987 1932–2005 English novelist: attributed, in
- Somewhere on a hill facing the sea, there is a very beautiful ancient stone, and it’s not going anywhere. It will be there, waiting for me. 1963– English artist: in the Art Newspaper 22 March 2016
- I will not…sulk about having no boyfriend, but develop inner poise and authority and sense of self as woman of substance, complete without boyfriend, as best way to obtain boyfriend.
Bridget Jones's Diary (1996) 1958– English writer:
- Personal relations are the important thing for ever and ever, and not this outer life of telegrams and anger.
Howards End (1910) ch. 19 1879–1970 English novelist:
- It is easier to live through someone else than to become complete yourself.
The Feminine Mystique (1963) ch. 14 1921–2006 American feminist:
- The soul is not where it lives, but where it loves.
Gnomologia (1732) no. 4761 1654–1734 English writer and physician:
- When we take people, thou wouldst say, merely as they are, we make them worse; when we treat them as if they were what they should be, we improve them as far as they can be improved.
sometimes quoted as ‘Treat a man as he is, and that is what he remains. Treat a man as he can be, and that is what he becomes’
Wilhelm Meisters Lehrjare (1795–6) bk. 8, ch. 4, tr. Thomas Carlyle 1749–1832 German poet, novelist, and dramatist:
- When you marry your mistress you create a job vacancy.
marrying Lady Annabel Birley in 1978
Tycoon (1987) 1933–97 British financier and politician: G. Wansell
- In human relations kindness and lies are worth a thousand truths.
The Heart of the Matter (1948) bk. 1, pt. 2, ch. 4 1904–91 English novelist:
- Their relationship consisted
In discussing if it existed.
1929–2004 English poet: ‘Jamesian’ (1992)
- Three things in human life are important. The first is to be kind. The second is to be kind. And the third is to be kind.
Henry James: A Life vol. 5 (1972) 1843–1916 American novelist: in 1902; Leon Edel
- What a child doesn't receive, he can seldom later give.
Time to Be in Earnest (1999) 1920–2014 English writer of detective stories:
- The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
Modern Man in Search of a Soul (1933) 1875–1961 Swiss psychologist:
- If one does not understand a person, one tends to regard him as a fool.
Mysterium Coniunctionis (1963) vol. 3 ‘The Personification of Opposites’ sect. 147 1875–1961 Swiss psychologist:
- It is easier to know man in general than to know one man in particular.
Maxims (1678) no. 436 1613–80 French moralist:
- We've got this gift of love, but love is like a precious plant. You can't just accept it and leave it in the cupboard or just think it's going to get on by itself. You've got to keep watering it. You've got to really look after it and nurture it. 1940–80 English pop singer and songwriter: television interview, 30 December 1969
- Ships that pass in the night, and speak each other in passing;
Only a signal shown and a distant voice in the darkness;
So on the ocean of life we pass and speak one another,
Only a look and a voice; then darkness again and a silence.
Tales of a Wayside Inn pt. 3 (1874) ‘The Theologian's Tale: Elizabeth’ pt. 4 1807–82 American poet:
- Difficilis facilis, iucundus acerbus es idem:
Nec tecum possum vivere nec sine te.
Difficult or easy, pleasant or bitter, you are the same you: I cannot live with you—or without you.
c.ad 40–c.104 Roman epigrammatist, born in Spain: Epigrammata bk. 12, no. 46(47)
- If I am pressed to say why I loved him, I feel it can only be explained by replying: ‘Because it was he; because it was me.’
of his friend Étienne de la Boétie
Essays (1580, ed. M. Rat, 1958) bk. 1, ch. 28 1533–92 French moralist and essayist:
- There is no substitute for the comfort supplied by the utterly taken-for-granted relationship.
A Severed Head (1961) 1919–99 English novelist:
- I believe a little incompatibility is the spice of life, particularly if he has income and she is pattable.
1902–71 American humorist: ‘I Do, I Will, I Have’ (1949)
- The time to make up your mind about people is never. 1940 film: spoken by Katharine Hepburn as Tracy Lord; written by Donald Ogden Stewart (1894–1980), from the play by Philip Barry
- I hold this to be the highest task for a bond between two people: that each protects the solitude of the other.
Gesammelte Briefe (1904) vol. 1 1875–1926 German poet: letter to Paula Modersohn-Becker, 12 February 1902, in
- It is not flesh and blood, but the heart which makes us fathers and sons.
The Robbers (1781) act 1, sc. 1 1759–1805 German dramatist and poet:
- Love and sex can go together and sex and unlove can go together and love and unsex can go together. But personal love and personal sex is bad.
Philosophy of Andy Warhol (From A to B and Back Again) (1975) 1927–87 American artist: