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date: 18 December 2017

Life and its Challenges 

see also lifestyle
  1. Life! Don’t talk to me about life.
    Douglas Adams 1952–2001 English science fiction writer: The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy (BBC radio, 1978), Marvin the Paranoid Android
  2. If you can't be a good example, then you'll just have to be a horrible warning.
    Catherine Aird 1930– English writer: in St Louis Post-Dispatch 1 November 1989
  3. I feel that life is—is divided up into the horrible and the miserable.
    Woody Allen 1935– American film director, writer, and actor: Annie Hall (1977 film, with Marshall Brickman)
  4. Life doesn’t imitate art. It imitates bad television.
    Woody Allen 1935– American film director, writer, and actor: Husbands and Wives (1992 film)
  5. Life is a sexually transmitted disease.
    Anonymous: graffito found on the London Underground
  6. Nothing matters very much and very few things matter at all.
    Arthur James Balfour 1848–1930 British Conservative statesman: Clodagh Anson Book: discreet memoirs (1931)
  7. Life, you know, is rather like opening a tin of sardines. We are all of us looking for the key.
    Alan Bennett 1934– English dramatist and actor: Beyond the Fringe (1961 revue) ‘Take a Pew’
  8. Brought up in the provinces in the forties and fifties one learned early the valuable lesson that life is generally something that happens elsewhere.
    Alan Bennett 1934– English dramatist and actor: introduction to Talking Heads (1988)
  9. There are things you just can’t do in life. You can’t beat the phone company, you can’t make a waiter see you until he’s ready to see you, and you can’t go home again.
    Bill Bryson 1951– American travel writer: The Last Continent (1989)
  10. There’s always somebody about to ruin your day, if not your life.
    Charles Bukowski 1920–94 German-born American writer: Pulp (1994)
  11. It's a funny old world—a man's lucky if he gets out of it alive.
    Walter de Leonand Paul M. Jones screenwriters: You're Telling Me (1934 film); spoken by W. C. Fields
  12. Auntie Mame's view:
    Life is a banquet, and some poor suckers are starving to death.
    Patrick Dennis 1921–76 American writer: Auntie Mame (1956)
  13. I find I always have to write something on a steamed mirror.
    Elaine Dundy 1921–2008 American writer: attributed; Laurence J. Peter Quotations for Our Time (1977)
  14. Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving.
    Albert Einstein 1879–1955 German-born theoretical physicist: letter to his son Eduard, 5 February 1930
  15. All men are equal—all men, that is to say, who possess umbrellas.
    E. M. Forster 1879–1970 English novelist: Howard's End (1910)
  16. Just when you’ve squared up to the solemn realization that life is a bitch, it turns round and does something nice, just to confuse you.
    Tom Holt 1961– English novelist: The Better Mousetrap (2008)
  17. Life is just one damned thing after another.
    Elbert Hubbard 1859–1915 American writer: in Philistine December 1909 (often attributed to Frank Ward O'Malley)
  18. Most of one’s life…is one prolonged effort to prevent oneself thinking.
    Aldous Huxley 1894–1963 English novelist: Mortal Coils 1922
  19. Do you know how helpless you feel if you have a full cup of coffee in your hand and you start to sneeze?
    Jean Kerr 1923–2003 American writer: Mary, Mary (performed 1961)
  20. Life doesn’t wait to be asked: it comes grinning in, sits down uninvited and helps itself to bread and cheese, and comments uninhibitedly on the decorations.
    Philip Larkin 1922–85 English poet: letter, 25 May 1958
  21. Life is something to do when you can't get to sleep.
    Fran Lebowitz 1950– American writer: Metropolitan Life (1978)
  22. For the happiest life, days should be rigorously planned, nights left open to chance.
    Mignon McLaughlin 1913–83 American writer: Complete Neurotic's Notebook (1981)
  23. The living are the dead on holiday.
    Maurice Maeterlinck 1862–1949 Belgian poet, dramatist, and essayist: Before the Great Silence (1935)
  24. There’s one thing to be said for inviting trouble: it generally accepts.
    Mae Maloo: attributed, in Reader's Digest September 1976
  25. Laugh it off, laugh it off; it's all part of life's rich pageant.
    Arthur Marshall 1910–89 British journalist and former schoolmaster: The Games Mistress (recorded monologue, 1937)
  26. Whenever I investigate a smell, I find that the answer is always bad. It's never: ‘What is that? [sniff] muffins’!
    Demetri Martin 1973– American comedian: attributed
  27. It's not true that life is one damn thing after another—it's one damn thing over and over.
    Edna St Vincent Millay 1892–1950 American poet: letter to Arthur Davison Ficke, 24 October 1930
  28. There are three ingredients in the good life: learning, earning, and yearning.
    Christopher Morley 1890–1957 American writer: Parnassus on Wheels (1917)
  29. Today’s tears are tomorrow’s yawn.
    Matthew Parris 1949– British journalist: in Times 7 February 2013
  30. There are few things in this world more reassuring than an unhappy lottery winner.
    Tony Parsons 1953– English writer: in Mirror2 November 1998
  31. You're born naked and the rest is drag.
    RuPaul 1960– American drag queen: attributed, 1990s
  32. I love living. I have some problems with my life, but living is the best thing they've come up with so far.
    Neil Simon 1927– American dramatist: Last of the Red Hot Lovers (1970)
  33. Life itself is a universally fatal sexually transmitted disease.
    Petr Skrabanek 1940–94and James McCormick: Follies and Fallacies in Medicine (1990)
  34. Life is a gamble at terrible odds—if it was a bet, you wouldn't take it.
    Tom Stoppard 1937– British dramatist: Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead (1967)
  35. Oh, isn't life a terrible thing, thank God?
    Dylan Thomas 1914–53 Welsh poet: Under Milk Wood (1954)
  36. We're all in this together—by ourselves.
    Lily Tomlin 1939– American comedienne and actress: attributed
  37. What a queer thing Life is! So unlike anything else, don't you know, if you see what I mean.
    P. G. Wodehouse 1881–1975 English-born writer: My Man Jeeves (1919)

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