- please accept my resignation. i don't want to belong to any club that will accept me as a member.
Groucho and Me (1959) ch. 26
- From the moment I picked up your book until I laid it down, I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it.
blurb written for S. J. Perelman's book Dawn Ginsberg's Revenge (1928)
Hector Arce Groucho (1979)
- Many years ago I chased a woman for almost two years, only to discover that her tastes were exactly like mine: we both were crazy about girls.
letter, 28 March 1955
- I never forget a face, but in your case I'll be glad to make an exception.
Leo Rosten People I have Loved, Known or Admired (1970) ‘Groucho’
- No, I'm breaking it in for a friend.
when asked if Groucho were his real name